susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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