im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
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