Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.