Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
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Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
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I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here