You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
You were trust falling into bushes
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Randomize
