You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
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