See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
