thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Randomize