and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize