i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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