i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
