i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Randomize
