First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Randomize