Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize