My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
You've changed since you got that strap on
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
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