life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
