we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
