your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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