Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
