I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Randomize
