I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize