I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
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