Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
