When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Randomize
