In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
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