I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize
