Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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