So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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