I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Randomize
