He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
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