When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
