it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
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