scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Randomize
