Sponge bath it is.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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