I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize
