so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
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