If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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