I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
