i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
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