I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Houston, we have a blender
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
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