the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
stop calling my apartment porn island.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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