iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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