Texts From Last Night

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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting

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  (401): I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting http://tfl.nu/c988
  Replies (2) Good night (643) Bad night (809)
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  (415): View more from California

  And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"

  (1-415): View more from California

  What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.

  (415): View more from California

  He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."

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  (415): And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!" (1-415): What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy. (415): He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie." http://tfl.nu/chbe
  Replies (27) Good night (974) Bad night (9652)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test

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  (847): Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test http://tfl.nu/tst5
  Replies (13) Good night (3045) Bad night (422)
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  (415): View more from California

  oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob

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  (415): oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob http://tfl.nu/u9lt
  Replies (3) Good night (2934) Bad night (575)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I want you more than these girls want KFC

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  (604): I want you more than these girls want KFC http://tfl.nu/a34i
  Replies (37) Good night (3690) Bad night (812)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.

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  (719): I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere. http://tfl.nu/w0w9
  Replies (11) Good night (3514) Bad night (478)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar

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  (317): Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar http://tfl.nu/plcg
  Replies (13) Good night (5590) Bad night (1070)
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs

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  (810): Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs http://tfl.nu/dxeo
  Replies (13) Good night (8659) Bad night (1292)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.

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  (610): He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember. http://tfl.nu/2y89
  Replies (6) Good night (1912) Bad night (1021)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.

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  (502): I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day. http://tfl.nu/53ab
  Replies (5) Good night (2147) Bad night (806)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.

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  (908): At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well. http://tfl.nu/xx0y
  Replies (2) Good night (697) Bad night (1301)
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  (516): View more from New York

  The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.

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  (516): The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me. http://tfl.nu/o6eb
  Replies (6) Good night (2752) Bad night (635)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std

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  (970): I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std http://tfl.nu/52gl
  Replies (14) Good night (542) Bad night (1473)
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  (714): View more from California

  I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?

  (1-714): View more from California

  Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious

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  (714): I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife? (1-714): Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious http://tfl.nu/3lv6
  Replies (4) Good night (1139) Bad night (336)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF

  (1-919): View more from North Carolina

  We're showing the video later bring pizza

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  (919): i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF (1-919): We're showing the video later bring pizza http://tfl.nu/1zdw
  Replies (2) Good night (685) Bad night (167)

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