Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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