sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
