Non-Jews are for practice
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
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