were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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