I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
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