Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize