Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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