i can't believe i had my finger in that
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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