Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
