Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
